Carl & Other Thoughts On BIPOC LGBTQIA Liberation

It took Carl guts to publicly announce his sexuality. But at the end of the day Carl Nissab can physically, financially, take care of himself. He has the support of the NFL. There’s Democrats in office and most of all he can be a Pride month show horse for convenient capitalism. The NFL is also banking on White Privilege to support Carl’s homosexuality. Someone had to do it eventually. But what if a Black or Latinx player wanted to come out? There’s a lot of cultural and political reasons why that probably wouldn’t happen. How would that have played out on the home field?

So we’re into football now. 🤣 Congrats to Carl Nissab for openly owning his sexuality!! Representation is super important, but one white player declaring their sexual orientation doesn’t change the rules of patriarchal games.

Raiders Defensive End, Carl Nissab

It doesn’t negate the fact that it’s ILLEGAL to be LGBTQIA in 69 countries. #ironic. Or that many of the people who watch Carl play, voted against trans youth from playing in them/they/their sports.

Teen suicide rates have dropped since marriage equality was legalized. But LGBTQIA youth are 8 times more likely to kill themselves than their heteronormative counterparts.

You may not see it, however social workers & counselors see kids who are still being told they are wrong for having same sex attractions or non-binary gender identifications.

White men have also colonized the narrow pelvic arc & declared private acts immoral except for ones they like themselves. 🎤

It took Carl guts to publicly announce his sexuality. But unlike many in the LGBTQIA community Carl Nissab can physically & financially take care of himself at this point. There’s a slim majority of Democrats in office. Finally, he’s kind of a convenient Pride month showhorse for the NFL Corporation.

The NFL is banking on White Privilege to support Carl’s sexual orientation. Someone had to do it eventually. But what if a Black, Asian, or Latinx player wanted to come out?

There’s a lot of cultural context and personal considerations to unpack with any decision like this. There are unfortunately very religious, financial & political reasons that wouldn’t play out on the home field just yet.

The same could be true for myself, friends, for many of us out there in the adult gay community. As difficult as it was for us to grapple with our sexuality, we’re still benefitting and from being Caucasian. It’s not a condemnation. It’s just something White gays need to be aware of.

You don’t get to just show up tipsy to 1 Pride Parade and that’s your Queer “Couture of Duty” for the year. 🤣

Just like Our Black Drag Mothers use silhouettes & songs to elevate the community- we must use our privilege & platforms. We must look out for our LGBTQIA+ fam lacking systemic access, relatives, or support networks.

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There are kids of all races and backgrounds living in foster homes, social work offices, in various places all across the world and country who may never have the opportunities to be openly queer, or to transition without fear of retaliation, or being abandoned, or feel safe enough to use a bathroom.

We’ve been conditioned to think “maybe it’s okay for a pop-star or an artist to be gay.” Yet homosexuality in sports is portrayed as gross and morally wrong.

LGBTQIA & BIPOC individuals are silently shamed into compliance at every societal level. So we’re flipping the script and creating cultures of equity, solidarity, & empowerment for all of us.

It’s as if fragile male identities would be destroyed if they found out a guy who works out & wears spandex might be punting for the same team. That has everything to do w/ the spectators than it does about being a “real” cis-gendered male. They still won’t let women play ball unless it’s off the field.Just like electing one Black POTUS & 1 female Black, Indian, & Asian VP are historic steps- they come 400 years too late. His important declaration doesn’t derail the religious & systemic oppressions which caused him or us to “come out” in the first place.

Unless we uproot the sources of racism and homophobia we’re only severing branches. We gotta stop paying lip service to the idea of queer & BIPOC liberation & own it.

You are free within your mind. The false dichotomies exist to divide us. Those in power conquer us while we squabble against one another. You have the ability and freewill to determine your emotions. You have the ability to deprogram yourselves. Personal transformation occurs in purposeful action by individuals, the establishment, & society.

Maybe more queer kids would play more sports if we had felt safe on the team. As Carl said, “representation and visibility are so important. I actually hope one day, the whole coming-out process won’t be necessary.” It’s the hope many people share. At least we know Carl’s out there on the field and he’s not alone. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍🤎

Break the Violent Fetters- Free Amazon E-book- this weekend only!

The new year’s as queer as this lagoon is clear! 😆🦄 Amazon’s allowing “Break the Violent Fetters” e-book to be sold for FREE starting midnight until, 1/7!! Hope this book inspires you on your journeys! Link- https://amzn.to/2UREPlt

The new year’s as queer as this lagoon is clear! 😆🦄 Amazon’s allowing “Break the Violent Fetters” e-book to be sold for FREE starting midnight until, 1/7!! Hope this book inspires you on your journeys! Link right here- Link- https://amzn.to/2UREPlt

Excerpted from Chapter 11- Let There Be Life

“It was through the beauty of nature & clarity of meditation that I came back to believing in a great union of connectedness between all beings. Emptying the egoic self in mindfulness even for a few seconds is the clearest I’ve ever felt. Meditation is like a prayer lit by the Universe sparking your mind into a blissful presence of being aware of consciousness and confounded by simultaneously forgetting that awareness.

This is what a light year must feel like coursing 756,000 miles an hour through space. It’s like where all the drugs, booze, or dancing is trying to bring us into. We have to booze the lover into our beds just to spill them out by morning. This is the pulse that the Universe is beating to, as if I’m thrusting my hips to a multidimensional rhythm.

The enjoyment of living must be why we are here, or why else would humans keep coming? For those who understand & live the wonder of our lives, it is our responsibility to shine a light on the paths for those who are still struggling- just as so many have lit our paths before us.

Birth is a beautifully painful event, & we don’t remember it. We are plants bursting through soil. That initial thrust into the earth must have been excruciating, but so deeply satisfying. If suffering was the true nature of life then why does Life continue to perpetuate? It is of profound detriment to all- for one not to tell their story before it is completed. To doubt that you do not also have a specific work to do to is of a profound detriment to the entire Universe.

Through natural disasters & loss of entire species- Life still abounds in the most unlikely places. Have you ever heard of Earth?”

First Book (about Coming Out in the South) gets published on Tuesday! 😍🙌

Surf’s up, shirt’s off! I submitted my first book to Amazon, last night, and it will be published on Tuesday 😀🙃. It took a tumultuous, exhilarating, soul-defining  year-and-a-half to write, “Break the Violent Fetters: Life Beyond the Closet and the Pulpit.” But it has taken a lifetime of experiences,  of identities, ideas, self-doubt, coming out, and finally self-acceptance that have shaped my journey.

Puerto Escondido, Mèxico- December 14, 2018

Whatever happens next, whether it’s a flop or a success, whether it helps anyone or is trashbinned into the literary abyss- I have grown, stressed, cried more, laughed more, trusted the Universe more, and found my authentic self within these penstrokes and revisiting the difficult years which honed me.

I hope the words, poems, photographs, in this narrative bring you clarity, hope, and confidence to pursue your truest life. And if none of that happens, I can rest knowing my story will live on forever, or as long as the world keeps spinning. There is always more to come. There is always another way. That’s all that I, that we can ever really hope for.